Pity Party

I'm having a pity party. Come on in. ;)

Today's workout was probably one of the easiest workouts I've ever seen posted for CrossFit. So why, then was I so freaking slow and once again, dead last to finish? I was so mad at myself by the end of the workout; disgusted, discouraged, embarrassed, mad, and defeated! Yes, "she who never gives up" felt completely, utterly defeated.

I don't understand what happened today. I pushed myself as hard as I could, but I couldn't physically make my legs run any faster. Some days I don't know why this happens. I truly don't know - it's like trying to run in a nightmare and my legs just won't cooperate. *sigh*

But once again, I didn't give up.

I finished the workout, gathered up my stuff, passed on the opportunity to do overhead squats, for which I am now kicking myself. I could have ended on a positive note. But instead, I wrote down my time in my WOD book, had a short conversation with Jim and headed to my car, where I promptly burst into tears and cried all the way home like a spoiled six year old. Ugh! Am I wasting my time with CrossFit? Am I just delusional to think I can keep doing this day after day and never getting any faster? I love feeling so healthy and strong, but on days like this when I disappoint myself so badly, I wonder if I'm doing myself any good at all.

I know...I know...tomorrow's another day and another chance to do better. I'll move on and get over my stupid dsappointment at today's piss poor performance. But, man, some days it's hard to convince myself I'm making any progress at all.

WOD:

3 Rounds for time of:

800 Meter run
50 Sit-ups (un-anchored, abmat)
50 Walking lunge steps

My time: 29:30 Rx